Building Self-Regulation Through Play: 5 Games That Make a Big Impact
Written by Melony Cohen, PsyD and Alexa Winer, AMFT
Helping children develop self-regulation, the ability to manage their thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, is one of the most important foundations we can give them. And the best part? It doesn’t have to feel like work. In fact, research shows that playing certain games just twice a week for about 30 minutes can significantly improve a child’s self-regulation skills.
These games are simple, fun, and packed with opportunities to practice listening, impulse control, teamwork, and emotional awareness. Here’s how you can bring them into your routine:
🏃♂️ Wakey Relay
Wakey Relay is a cooperative movement game where two players carry an object together using specific body parts—like elbow to elbow, shoulder to shoulder, or back to back. The challenge lies in moving in sync without dropping the object, and part of the fun is brainstorming creative combinations. This makes it a playful way to encourage physical coordination and connection.
Beyond movement, this game opens space for meaningful conversations around asking for help, working together, and staying calm when things don’t go as planned. It’s a chance for children to experience what it feels like to solve problems as a team and manage emotions while navigating physical challenges together.
🚦 Red Light, Green Light
This classic stop-and-go game helps kids practice listening and body control. When “green light” is called, players move forward; when “red light” is called, they must stop immediately. For a fun twist, you can reverse the commands to keep kids on their toes and encourage cognitive flexibility.
Because children need to respond quickly yet thoughtfully, this game naturally lends itself to practicing impulse control. It provides a playful way to reflect on how we pause before acting, make careful decisions, and listen fully—skills that apply far beyond the game itself.
🫧 Self-Control Bubbles
To play Self-Control Bubbles, blow bubbles and invite children to pop as many as they like during the first round. In the next round, challenge them not to touch any bubbles at all—even if they land right on them! Alternate between rounds to give kids a fun but challenging opportunity to practice restraint.
This game turns a joyful activity into a hands-on lesson in self-control. It invites children to notice what it feels like to hold back, and creates natural opportunities to connect that experience to real-life situations like waiting in line, sharing, or managing excitement.
❄️ The Freeze Game
The Freeze Game is a music-and-movement activity where children dance or move around while music plays, then freeze in place when the music stops. You can vary the tempo to encourage kids to adapt their energy levels to different rhythms, supporting flexibility and attention.
As children transition quickly from movement to stillness, they build body awareness and sharpen their ability to respond to cues. It’s a lighthearted but powerful way to help kids recognize and regulate high energy in everyday environments.
🟢 Ready, Set, Go!
This racing game becomes a self-regulation challenge when you replace the word “go” with silly decoy words like “gorilla” or “spaghetti.” Players have to listen carefully and wait for the real “go” before running. It’s a simple tweak that adds excitement while reinforcing patience and focus.
What seems like just a game becomes a valuable exercise in body control, timing, and managing anticipation. It’s a natural segue into conversations about personal space, waiting your turn, and making thoughtful choices in group settings.
Why It Matters
Children learn best through play. These kinds of games don’t just pass the time; they offer meaningful, hands-on opportunities for practicing essential life skills. By integrating just a few playful moments each week, you're helping children build the foundation for resilience, emotional intelligence, and positive relationships.
